Cutting Room Floor: Unfiltered with Becs – Breaking The Silence: Misogyny and Self Advocacy

Speaker: 00:00:06

Amanda Paolicelli:

What's up, Radiant Icons?

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And welcome back to Dare to be

Iconic, the podcast made for

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icons daring to be themselves.

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I'm your host, Amanda Paolicelli

and before I reveal what episode

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guys have seen my Instagram post

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from this morning, then you already

know, but if not, no worries.

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I'm going to spill the

tea right here, right now.

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So yeah.

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Anywho, let's get to today's episode.

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We are going to listen to an exclusive

cutting room from clip from our third

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everyday icon this season, Becs.

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So are you ready, Radiant Icons?

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Because your tea time

sesh is starting now.

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I feel like as You You know,

we've grown up acting, right?

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Up till now to this point, like, I

feel like the industry has gotten a

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little bit more accepting of everyone.

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Like, I feel like it's more inclusive.

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I think that's the right way to say it.

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Like, it's, the industry has gotten

more inclusive whether that's Yeah.

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Body positivity, so on and so forth,

like, I think there was that human

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element that was missing when we

just, like, had started, you know?

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To break

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Becs: it down for everybody, we were

starting our entertainment careers

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when America's Next Top Model was

on, and size 4 women were being

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told that they were morbidly obese.

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Yeah,

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Amanda Paolicelli: yeah, no, that

was And I looked up to America's Next

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Top Model, though, that's the thing,

that's so crazy, like, Tyra Banks was

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like, my My girl, like I loved her.

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I loved America's Next Top Model.

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Like, I don't, I probably

have said this on the podcast.

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Like, let's be so for real, I would

practice walking on the runway and

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like being like, do, do, do, do

I'm a four 11 girl with curves.

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I'm a curvy woman.

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Curvy and short.

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But like, Tyra was saying that

I had to look a certain way,

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and that's what I thought.

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And that contributed to a lot

of like, my self esteem and

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like, my body image issues.

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A main part of it was Watching TV

and watching the shows like America's

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Next Top Model and not looking like

any of them, whether it was my height

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or my weight, I never truly felt like

I was gonna belong in the industry.

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And maybe that's why I was like, you

know what, I need to step back because it

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was no longer It's no longer fun trying

for me because I was getting rejected so

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much and rejection is a big part of it.

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Whether we're acting or whether

we're content creators, right, or

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influencers, however you want to label

us, rejection is a big part of it.

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So how do you deal with rejection?

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Becs: Not well, I can tell you that much.

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Amanda Paolicelli: Yeah, no, we

definitely don't deal with it well.

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I already knew the

answer, but you know what?

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Let's just, let's just talk about it.

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Like,

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Becs: it's not

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Amanda Paolicelli: fun, but let's

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Becs: talk about it.

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Along with, like, some of, you know,

my mental health stuff that I, I

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have, um, going on which, it's not

what this podcast episode is about.

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Um, but, it's, it's hard for me to

Accept rejection and it, it hurts a

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little bit more like when it's something,

obviously it's going to hurt more when

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it's something that you really wanted.

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Um, but I remember the first time that I

was turned down and told no for a role.

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It was my freshman year of high school and

I was going to a performing arts school.

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So everybody there was, you know, in

the field and I had auditioned for the

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spring musical, which was, um, Cinderella

and I'm not the best singer, but I, you

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know, I got into the school every show

that I had auditioned for beforehand.

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I had gotten in, I auditioned for the

fall show and I got in, I was thinking

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like maybe a nice ensemble role.

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And I remember opening a The letter,

because it was an actual letter this time.

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Wow, what?

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I've never heard of that.

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Wow.

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Okay.

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Yeah, it was like, you went, like, as

you were leaving for the buses, you

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would like stop and pick up your letter.

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Wait, Bex, you're younger than

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Amanda Paolicelli: me.

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Like, you're literally not

by much, everyone, okay?

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I'm not, I'm not that old.

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I'm literally 25, and like,

Vex is like, you're 23, right?

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23?

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Yeah.

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You just turned 23, right?

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Okay.

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Yeah, we're doing this

before our birthdays.

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I just

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Becs: turned 23.

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I'm turning 24, like, next month.

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I know, I know, I know.

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But yes, no, I did just turn 23.

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I'm actually, I'm actually, I, I

didn't get to, to vote this year.

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I'm a child.

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Amanda Paolicelli: Yeah, literally.

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We're so young and out of the womb.

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I'm a mom.

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But I'm so,

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Becs: I'm, I'm brand new.

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I was born last week.

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Amanda Paolicelli: No, literally.

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That's why I look so good.

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But like, I, I'm older than

you by like a year or two.

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And like, I never ever heard

of like a physical letter.

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So that is mind blowing to me, but okay.

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Anyway, not the point of the story, but

like, please, I just had to say that.

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That's like so mind blowing.

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Okay.

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Okay.

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Becs: Yeah.

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It was, a weird thing.

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Like usually they'll put

up like the call list.

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Yeah, like you see that

in a bunch of like, yeah.

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My school, I think it was because it was

specifically performing arts that they

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gave letters so everybody could open them

in private and it wasn't a big thing.

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That's actually a

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Amanda Paolicelli: good point.

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That's a good point.

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Yeah.

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Becs: Yeah, so I got my letter and I

walked out and I was opening it with

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my friend and I remember she opened

hers and she looked at it and then she

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was like, oh, well, what is your say?

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And I opened mine and it said,

we do not have a role for you.

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And I was like, I remember like,

my face fell, like, I just felt

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completely drained in that moment

because it was the first time that

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I had ever experienced a rejection.

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And no, we don't have a role for you.

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No, you're not going to be in this one.

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Like.

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And it was, it was,

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it was learning at 14 years old

how to deal with that gracefully.

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Because now you have a whole

bunch of other people around you.

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Spoiler, everybody

around me also got a no.

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And like, having to, to be like, Oh,

well, you know, there's always next time.

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Like, there's next year.

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We can do it next year.

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Because you don't want to be

that one person that's like,

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Well, why didn't I get cast?

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Yeah, and it's so easy to do that.

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Yeah.

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Mm hmm.

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Yeah.

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And it's like, oh, well, I deserve

the role more than you, like,

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because you didn't, you know.

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Amanda Paolicelli: I get that.

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No, I totally do.

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So what has it taught you about yourself

and how do you stay motivated to keep

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pushing forward towards that one yes?

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Becs: So obviously it's, it's been a

couple years since that first rejection

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and there have been a lot more after.

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Um, I never got to do a

musical at the school.

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Guess what?

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I'm not a singer.

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It kind of makes sense, you know?

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So, um, there, there were definitely a

lot more rejections that followed that one

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and some of them were harder than others.

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Um, and some of them

weren't even a complete no.

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Like, I auditioned for

Alice in Wonderland.

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I was hoping to get the role of Alice,

and I got the White Queen instead.

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Um, and I also got to be

Humpty Dumpty a couple times.

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That was, that was fun.

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Um, but it was,

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it was making the best out of that role.

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And that was one of the roles that my

acting teacher had told me that the

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character that I am bringing to it

specifically is, like, the little bit

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of me that I brought, what I had to

offer the character of the White Queen.

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Like, lit up the stage,

basically, is what he told me.

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And he could have just been saying

that to make me feel better.

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But I feel like that helped a lot

with understanding that there's

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going to be a lot of no's, but the

yeses that you get are going to be

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that much sweeter because of it.

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You know, like, don't, just because

it's not going the way that you

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anticipated doesn't mean that it's not.

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Going the way that it's supposed to.

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Period.

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Amanda Paolicelli: Cause we're

exactly where we're meant to be.

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Even if it doesn't feel like it, everyone.

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We are exactly where we're supposed

to be cause we gotta trust that path.

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Like, we trust an Uber.

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Point Lincoln, period.

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Becs: The rejections, they,

they, they still hurt.

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Every once in a while.

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Like, you know, my, my dream

company to work for right now.

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And every time I send something

and I go, And they go, no,

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Amanda Paolicelli: they say,

not yet, not yet, because it's

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coming for you, you know, stop.

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Oh my God.

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No, it's going to happen, Becs.

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It is like you said, like

it's going to happen.

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Becs: I'm not going to give up.

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Yeah.

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Eventually they are going to hire

me because eventually there's going

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to be a role that I am perfect for.

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And they're going to have

to finally give me a yes.

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Period.

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Yes.

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All of the rejection in the past is

not going to matter at that point.

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Amanda Paolicelli: Exactly.

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Because

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Becs: I got, you know, something, and if

I just give up, then I'll never get a yes.

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And it'll just be that history of

no's that I'm stuck with, you know?

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And that's not, that's not good for me.

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Yeah.

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I'm not okay with just getting

a no and then giving up.

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Yeah, that's not you.

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I'm eventually going to just hear

a yes, a congratulations, uh,

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I have this for you, you know?

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Amanda Paolicelli: Alright, Radiant Icons,

that is your tea time sesh for today.

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I hope you enjoyed today's cutting

room floor episode with Becs.

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Make sure to subscribe, to leave a

comment, to leave a rating, to leave

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a review, to tell your friends about

us, to tell anyone and everyone,

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That link is in the show notes below.

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But anywho, I will chat

with you guys next week.

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Remember, Radiant Icons,

Dare to be Iconic.

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Bye!