You're Not Late, You're Becoming: Why You Are Exactly Where You Are Meant To Be
You’re not behind, radiant icons— you’re becoming. 💖
In this week’s tea time sesh, Amanda spills the tea about that quiet panic we all feel when life doesn’t look like everyone else’s. From career detours to love that didn’t last, she shares how trusting divine timing led her to some of the most unexpected — and iconic — chapters of her story.
This one’s for the Radiant Icons learning to slow down, soften, and finally breathe into the truth that you are exactly where you’re meant to be. You’ll walk away feeling lighter, more grounded, and ready to see your journey through a new lens of gratitude and grace.
✨ guided meditation included — because healing starts from within
✨ exclusive details on our Two Years, One Iconic celebration sale
✨ reminder: your path is unfolding perfectly, even when it doesn’t feel like it
Because you’re not running late to your purpose. You’re right on time for your becoming. 🌸
Connect with Amanda:
Submit your order for the Two Years, One Iconic Celebration Sale!
Stream the Radiant Reign Era Playlist!
Discover your iconic signature scent with Oakcha!
Got a question for Amanda or a topic you'd love to hear discussed on a future episode? Submit your question to the "Dare To Be Iconic Hotline" today!
Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome to Dare To Be Iconic
01:00 Two Years, One Iconic celebration
02:24 The pressure of feeling “behind” in life
03:13 Reflections on love, timing, and becoming
08:16 Embracing your own timeline + releasing comparison
20:53 Guided meditation: trusting your journey
22:56 Craft your signature scent
24:14 Sneak peek of next week’s tea time sesh
Transcript
What's up, radiant icons and welcome back to Dare To Be
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:Iconic, the podcast made for icons
who are daring to be themselves.
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:I'm your host, Amanda Paolicelli,
and for today's tea time sesh, we
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:are spilling the tea on why you are
exactly where you are meant to be
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:because you are not late radiant icon.
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:No, no, no, no.
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:You are becoming today's Tea Time sesh
is all about that pressure of falling
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:behind, whether that's in love, in
success, career, healing, whatever it
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:is, we are diving into that pressure.
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:We are dissecting it, and we are learning
how to trust that our timing is divine.
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:It is not delayed.
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:But before we get into all of that piping
hot tea, make sure to connect with me
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:on socials on Instagram and TikTok.
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:It's @amandapaolicelli_ and
@daretobeiconic_ And if you're
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:on LinkedIn, radiant icons.
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:You already know what I'm gonna say
because I love me some LinkedIn, make
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:sure to connect with me on there.
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:It's Amanda Paolicelli.
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:All of my socials will be
linked in the show notes below.
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:And also radiant icons.
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:While you're in the show notes
connecting with me on socials, make
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:sure to check out our two years,
one Iconic celebration order form.
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:As you know, Dare To Be Iconic, just
celebrated it's second birthday, and as we
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:go into year three, we need to celebrate.
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:So we're celebrating all month long
here at Dare To Be Iconic 'cause you
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:know, we love an iconic celebration
and while we are having an exclusive
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:sale that you could only findat Dare
To Be Iconic, and all the information
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:regarding that exclusive sale, which
is a merch piece of your choosing
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:from the Radiant Reign Collection and
our breakup journal, they are paired
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:together for an exclusive bundle price.
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:You can find all that information
in the show notes below for our
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:Two Years, One Iconic celebration.
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:Now that we have done our housekeeping
here at Dare To Be Iconic,
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:let's get to the tea, shall we?
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:Let's spill some piping hot tea on
why you are exactly where you are
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:meant to be, because you are not late.
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:You are what you are
becoming radiant icon.
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:So are you ready for your tea time
sesh because it's starting now.
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:So I'm gonna shake things up a
little bit for this tea time sesh.
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:I mean, why not?
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:It's a new season, it's a new
energy and well, it's just iconic.
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:But anyway, as we dive into this
tea time sesh, right, and dissect
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:that feeling of falling behind
in whatever area of life it is.
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:I challenge you to think of this prompt.
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:When was the last time you
told yourself you were behind?
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:And what did you feel like
you should have already done?
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:And when I think of this prompt,
radiant icons, I think of a couple
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:months ago, actually, not even a couple
months ago, a month ago, exactly, on a
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:random Wednesday night getting drinks,
one of my really good girlfriends.
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:And that was the last time I
told myself that I was behind.
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:Now what did I feel like I
should have already done by then?
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:Well.
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:It's not gonna be a shocker here that I'm
gonna say this, but, oh well, here we go.
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:Here goes nothing.
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:I feel like I'm behind in
love, the honest truth.
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:I'm 26 years old, I'll be 27 on December
19th of this year, and I've never been
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:in love and I think, or I feel like I
should have already done that already.
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:I should have already been in love by now.
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:I feel behind in the love department.
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:For me, that's a big insecurity that I
am battling and that I am dealing with
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:'cause I look around even when I was
in my previous relationship, right?
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:I would look around at all my girlfriends
and they would have experiences
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:in dating or in love in general.
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:And I don't have that.
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:When I was dating my past partner, right?
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:Everything was very new for me.
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:There were a lot of new
feelings coming up, and there
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:were a lot of new experiences.
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:Everything was just new, right?
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:Because I was so inexperienced
in the dating department.
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:And when I came out of that relationship,
heartbreak was the only thing that was
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:familiar to me if I'm being honest.
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:Because if there's one thing that
I know I can confidently do in
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:life is turn my pain into power.
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:And heartbreak was a comfortable feeling
for me, if I'm being honest, because
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:I've already dealt with that before.
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:I already knew what to expect,
but this other feeling outside of
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:heartbreak, this this feeling of
just looking around and being like,
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:oh my God, did I miss my moment?
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:Did I miss my moment to fall in love
because I was too scared to do it
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:after the letter in the box right?
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:I was too scared to put myself out
there romantically and get hurt again.
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:That's why I waited three years.
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:And then when I finally did
it and I was like, you know
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:what, I'm just gonna go for it.
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:I'm just gonna put my heart on the line
and then have it blow up in my face.
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:I was like, oh wow.
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:I really am behind in this department
'cause I don't know what to expect.
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:I don't know what to do when these things
come up, and I know a lot of people say,
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:oh, relationships are so unique and you
have to figure them out and this and that.
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:Like everyone's different.
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:I get that.
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:I understand that.
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:However, that doesn't negate
the feeling that I still feel
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:like I'm falling behind in love.
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:I am 26 years old and
I've never been in love.
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:I've never had a happy, truly happy
experience with this concept of love.
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:All I've ever had is pain.
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:All I've ever had is brokenness.
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:All I've ever had is just shit.
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:If I'm being honest, I have been
so unlucky in romantic love.
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:I am so lucky in platonic love
and familial love and like maybe
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:that's enough, but part of me
still thinks like, damn, Amanda,
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:you really don't know what
the hell you're doing.
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:You, you really are behind in this,
this concept of what love is and
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:how to experience it and all these
other things that are mixed up in it.
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:And so when I think back of
that prompt, radiant icons.
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:For me, that's what I struggle with.
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:For me, that's what I think
of, oh, I should have already
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:been in love by now, right?
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:I should have already had those
experiences, but I don't, and then I go
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:deeper into the, oh, well, shit, did I
miss my moment because I was too scared?
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:I was too scared to get hurt again.
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:I closed myself off to the
possibility of falling in love.
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:That's why I waited three years
and didn't do anything about it.
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:And then for this breakup to
happen, I just feel like an
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:idiot and it puts me back to that
place of, holy shit, I really.
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:I really am just behind.
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:I look around at everyone, whether
it's on social media or one of my,
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:you know, not even one of my, a lot
of my friends are in happy, healthy
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:relationships, and I keep thinking,
huh, when is it gonna be my turn?
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:When is it gonna be my turn?
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:Because I have the career.
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:I have the career that I want.
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:I have the success that
I've only dreamed of, right?
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:It's my reality now.
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:But love.
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:For me, that's the pressure where
I feel like, oh my God, I am behind
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:and I have to remind myself that
everyone's timeline is different.
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:We could be on the same chapter, right?
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:We can both be on chapter 26 of our lives,
but my chapter 26 and your chapter 26
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:are going to look completely different
because we both are on completely
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:different paths on where we are supposed
to be at to become the versions of
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:ourselves that we are meant to be.
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:And so when I think of, oh, I should
have been there already, or, oh, I should
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:have done that, or, oh, I should have
done, like, all those little things that
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:love to tell me that, oh, you, you just
aren't, you just, you're just not there.
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:You're just not there, Amanda, when all
those voices come flooding in, right?
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:I have to remind myself that
all of our timelines are going
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:to look completely different.
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:And every detour in life is leading us
to exactly where we are meant to be.
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:And sometimes, yeah, it does feel like,
oh, I'm a little bit late to the party.
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:Why I did.
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:No one tell me It's started at
nine o'clock and I'm here at 11.
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:Right?
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:Why do I feel like I'm late?
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:But the truth is.
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:You're not, you are not late.
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:You just aren't supposed to be
experiencing that emotion, that
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:feeling, or that experience, right?
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:That adventure at that point in your life.
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:For me, in chapter 26 of my life, I
was not meant to be in a relationship.
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:I mean, clearly, right?
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:Because it ended.
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:And I also think this, when
things are not meant to be in your
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:life and you're in them, right?
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:So case in point, my prior relationship,
I thought, oh, this is the perfect time
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:for me to be in a relationship, right?
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:And I tried my all and well
things didn't work out.
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:I mean, we all know they
didn't work out, right?
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:I mean, we have a whole
new era because of it.
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:But that was the universe telling me
that this relationship is not where
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:you're supposed to be in your life.
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:It's not supposed to be
in your path right now.
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:So we're gonna create a detour, right?
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:We're gonna have you break up.
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:We're gonna have that relationship
no longer exists so that you can get
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:back on the path of where you were
supposed to be so you can become the
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:Amanda that you are supposed to become.
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:The universe is going to figure out ways
to literally break, take away, rip away
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:from you, however you wanna phrase it.
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:What is not supposed to be in your path
or in your life for that specific chapter?
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:That's why you're gonna feel friction
and you're gonna feel resistance
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:when it doesn't feel right,
because it's not meant for you.
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:And that's also a tough pill to
swallow because like, damn, I
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:thought it was the right thing.
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:Right?
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:That's why I made the decision
to have him be my boyfriend.
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:That's why I made the decision to be in
that relationship with him, because I
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:thought for myself that was the right
thing to do for this chapter of my life.
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:But the universe had other plans
for me and said, hell no, girl
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:we're getting you out of it.
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:And that's why we broke up.
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:I mean, there was a lot of other
reasons why we broke up, as we all
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:know from the previous episodes.
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:But that was the universe telling me
that this relationship is not meant to be
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:in my path or in my life, especially in
this chapter, in this chapter of my life.
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:I had to take the detour of going on
that relationship and get broken up
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:with to then become this Amanda that
is free, that is liberated, that is
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:empowered, that is finding joy and
giving herself permission to live.
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:Because I would've never gotten to
this amanda, that you are hearing
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:right now or for if you're on YouTube.
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:Hello.
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:Hi.
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:How are you?
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:That you and the Amanda that you are
seeing right here on your screen.
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:That Amanda would not be existent if
I didn't go into that relationship
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:and have that detour happen to realign
me to where I'm supposed to go.
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:And that's the exact same
thing I'm gonna tell you guys.
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:Even when we feel behind, even when we
feel like, oh, we missed our moment,
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:and even when we're in the things that
we think are right, the universe knows
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:exactly where we are meant to be.
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:And if it is not meant for you, it's
gonna make sure you are not in it.
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:Right?
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:And then going back to the, oh, I feel
like I should be X, y, and z, la la, la.
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:I challenge you to do this when you
are feeling behind radiant icons.
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:Because I have started doing it
and it has been so beneficial.
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:I challenge you to think of this.
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:How can you hold gratitude for the
season of life that you are in, even
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:if it's not the one you imagined?
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:I never thought at 26 years old, I
would've gotten into my first relationship
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:after being single for so long, and then
for it to only end within a three month
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:period, and then after that have this
rebirth of who I am now, I would've never
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:imagined that the version of Amanda that
I am today would've happened because I was
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:in a relationship and got broken up with.
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:I would've never imagined that.
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:If you would've told me January of
:
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:you're gonna get into a relationship
and it's only gonna last three months
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:and you're gonna break up, and then
you're gonna create a whole new era.
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:I would've been like, huh?
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:I would've been like, what?
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:I've been like, please
don't give that to me.
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:I said, universe, do not give that to me.
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:Give that to someone else.
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:Right.
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:I, I would've said that.
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:But, but I need to learn how
to accept the gratitude for the
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:season that I'm in right now.
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:And the truth is, I am in the
heartbreak, rebuilding myself
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:stage or season of my life.
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:I need to hold gratitude for that
and understand that falling in love,
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:or even the idea of being in love
with someone else, that romantic
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:love is not meant for me right now.
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:Because I'm supposed to be on this
path of truly learning who Amanda is
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:in this new era of freedom, in this
new era where she's giving herself
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:permission to live her life, I cannot
do thatwith someone attached to me.
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:Right?
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:I can't do that with a partner.
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:I, I just can't, I don't
think that's in my DNA.
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:I think I have to be
independent right now.
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:I have to learn or enjoy, right?
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:How to be in my own presence again.
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:Going back to the season three premiere
radiant icons, just last week Solo, Not
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:Lonely: How To Be Your Own Best Friend.
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:I have to learn how to be my own
best friend in this stage of life
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:because I've never done that before.
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:That is the season that I'm in, and
that is the gratitude that I'm holding.
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:I am learning and enjoying
how to be in my own presence.
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:I'm learning how solitude truly
can be empowering, and I'm
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:learning that love right now.
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:Romantic love is just not in the
cards for me and that is okay.
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:Maybe I'm meant to just talk to a couple
of guys, have a little roster of fans
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:and just learn what I do and don't
like, because before my ex-boyfriend.
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:I never dated.
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:I didn't know what the hell I wanted,
you know, and I, I talked to him.
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:I thought, oh, he's a great guy,
like this and that, blah, blah, blah.
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:And then we got into a relationship.
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:Maybe, maybe I'm in this stage of my
life, the season of my life, to now
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:do what I didn't do before I went
into that relationship and truly learn
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:what I want and what I need, because
I just went through that, right?
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:I just went through a relationship where I
learned a lot about myself and thank you.
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:Good riddance are outta my life.
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:But now.
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:Now I can take that and build
on this list while I get to know
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:other people, while also getting
to know myself and my independence.
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:Maybe that's what I hold gratitude for and
maybe that's the realization I'm having
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:right here, right now on this mic yapping
to you all about my life, maybe that's it.
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:And I think it is.
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:And so I challenge you when you
have this this overwhelming feeling
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:that you are behind in life, and
that, oh, maybe I missed my moment.
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:There is no such thing as feeling
as if you missed your moment,
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:because every moment in your life
is detailed perfectly to you on the
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:timeline that you are meant to be on.
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:There is no such thing as falling behind
because you are never falling behind
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:on the path that is meant for you.
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:You are never late to
the party of your life.
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:You just aren't.
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:Okay?
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:You're the party point blank period.
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:So I challenge you radiant icons to think
of the gratitude in these in-between
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:stages of life that are messy, that are
weird, and you know what or necessary,
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:because it's the in-between, in the
becoming stages of who we are meant
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:to be that are the most powerful.
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:So lean into it and be grateful.
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:Find what you are grateful for in
the season of your life, even if
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:it is not one that you imagined.
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:And I also wanna mention radiant icons
that becoming isn't perfect, right?
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:Becoming isn't glamorous.
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:In fact, it's the exact opposite.
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:It's messy and it's chaos, and
it's those often unseen moments.
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:You are actively figuring out
who you are meant to become.
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:And that shit isn't pretty.
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:That shit honestly is mostly dark and
heavy and emotional, and there's gonna
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:be tears and you know, there's gonna be
times where you choose to start again.
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:And there's gonna be times where,
you know what, maybe it is happy.
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:Maybe there are some
rainbow and sunshines.
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:But you know what?
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:It's not always like that.
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:It's really not.
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:In this stage of becoming, for me
personally, I can tell you firsthand
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:I have cried so much, and I know it
probably doesn't seem like it when I'm
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:on this podcast yapping about my life
or maybe through my social content.
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:And you know, I take great pride in
finding a silver lining and a lesson
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:in every every aspect of my life.
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:I take immense pride in that.
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:And you know, the way I've been
able to work on my mindset to think
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:in a positive manner, however.
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:I have been struggling.
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:I am very, very hurt, but I know
I have to feel every emotion,
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:especially the not so pretty ones.
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:I have to allow myself to feel it in
order to become who I am meant to be, and
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:well, if I just have to cry every single
day like I have been, well then so be it.
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:That's what I have to do.
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:That's what I have to do in order to
become the Amanda, that I am meant to
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:become radiant icons, and I don't want
you to feel like that's like wrong or
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:like shameful or embarrassing because
honestly, for a while, while I've been
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:figuring out you know, this, this new era
of my life, there have been times where
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:I feel embarrassed and I feel shameful
for these feelings of falling behind and
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:maybe not, you know, living up to these
certain timelines or milestones that
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:society has set upon us, especially women.
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:'cause you know, women,
we always, you know.
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:They always want us to have babies and
get married early on, and especially
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:if you're in a Hispanic household,
then you know what I'm talking about.
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:Okay.
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:You, you already know I'm
half Cuban, half Italian.
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:You already know that my mom
wants me to have babies and get
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:married, and she wanted me to have
that like, like three years ago.
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:Three years ago, radiant icons.
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:I mean, she's still, she's still asking.
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:But anyway, the point is, right, it's,
it's those, those pressures right
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:to adhere to the timelines and the
societal pressures that are put upon us,
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:especially as women like and sometimes.
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:They're just not meant for you.
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:And I just don't think that, not as, I
don't think I know that I'm not meant
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:to get married anytime soon, and I'm
not meant to have children anytime soon.
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:I don't even know if I want children.
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:And you know what?
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:That's okay, but society's gonna
tell me no, that's not okay.
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:You should be a mom.
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:I don't think so.
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:I don't think that's meant for me
in my path, at least right now.
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:I don't think it's meant for me.
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:Right?
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:And that's okay.
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:It's okay to not know.
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:It's okay to be emotional.
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:It's okay to experience these emotions
of shame and embarrassment and like,
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:oh my God, like just being lost.
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:Like, it's okay.
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:This process of becoming is messy.
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:It's not glamorous and it's okay.
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:And I challenge you to remind
yourself of this when you're in
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:the thick of this becoming right,
I challenge you to remember that
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:you are not late radiant icon.
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:You are layered and you
still are unfolding.
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:All right, radiant icons I told you I
was shaking things up here today on Dare
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:To Be Iconic for our Tea Times sesh and
instead of doing our beloved hotline,
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:don't worry, you'll be here next week.
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:This week I decided to bring back one of
the favorites 'cause you guys ate this up
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:especially if you were in my Daring To Be
Confident Masterclass, then you already
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:know what I'm talking about most likely.
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:It is a guided meditation
because I am a firm believer that
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:visualization and manifestation are
some of the most powerful tools.
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:And while you're in this.
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:Stage of becoming and letting
go of that pressure or that
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:feeling of falling behind.
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:You need to learn how to trust your voice.
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:And the best way to do
that is to visualize it.
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:You need to visualize
how to trust your voice.
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:So get comfy.
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:Close your eyes.
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:If you are driving and walking,
do not close your eyes.
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:Just get comfy.
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:Get into the mood.
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:'cause we're doing a guided
meditation in three, two.
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:One.
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:Take a deep breath in.
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:Feel yourself soften into the
truth that you are not behind.
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:Picture your journey as a timeline, but
instead of a straight line, it's a spiral.
380
:You keep returning to lessons,
but each time at a higher level,
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:say to yourself, I am not late.
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:I am becoming.
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:Every pause is preparation.
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:I am exactly where I am meant to be.
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:Inhale, faith, exhale, comparison.
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:Let your heart whisper: my
timing is my protection.
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:When you're ready, come
back to this moment.
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:Grounded.
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:Grateful.
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:Becoming.
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:Okay, radiant icons.
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:I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.
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:As you know, we are in our radiant
reign era and for me in this era, I have
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:been finding little things that make me
feel powerful, that make me feel sexy,
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:that make me feel unapologetically me.
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:And one of those is my
iconic signature scent.
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:I have crafted mine with Oakcha,
I do sinful layered with that girl
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:vanilla, and it is delectable.
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:It is sinful and it is sexy if I
say so myself . Every spritz just
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:feels like confidence bottled up.
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:It is my reminder that I am evolving
for myself, not anyone's dusty ass son.
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:And you can have that too, radiant icons.
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:Make sure to build your own
fragrance through Oakcha.
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:Use the discount code linked in the show
notes below to save yourself some cash,
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:because icons do not follow trends.
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:We set the standard.
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:All right, radiant icons.
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:That is your tea time session for today.
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:If you enjoy today's episode, make
sure to subscribe, to leave a rating, a
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:review, to tell your friends about us,
to tell everyone and anyone, because
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:you know, we love more radiant icons
and now we're iconic community of ours.
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:I will never get tired of
saying that Radiance icons.
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:But anyway, let's chat about next week's
tea time sesh, because I know I am excited
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:and I know my interns are excited, which
means you all my lovely, lovely, lovely
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:radiant icons will also be excited.
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:So, as I mentioned, um, maybe a
little bit earlier on in today's tea
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:time sesh that I may have a little
roster of fans who just like, love
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:and adore me, you know, when they.
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:All these men are just in love with me.
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:They're like, oh, you so obsessed with me.
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:That's the truth.
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:Because as soon as I became single, I
had men flying out the woodwork telling
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:me they loved me and well, that's
what we're chatting about next week.
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:We are spilling the tea on dating
dilemmas and why I am so over crushing
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:on potential because Kesha, she loves
to fall in love with a red flag.
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:And you know what?
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:I love crushing over potential and
I think that's my personal red flag.
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:So next week is gonna be a fun one.
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:I'll talk to you guys next next week then.
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:I can't wait.
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:I truly can't wait.
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:Y'all, it's gonna be so good.
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:You guys are gonna be fed and well
welcome to my life Alright radiant icons.
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:I'll chat with y'all next week.
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:Remember, dare to be iconic.
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:Bye.